They’re at Candyboots.com now, o hapless soul.

This is the first night all week that my Comcast high-speed internet hasn’t repeatedly sputtered and died. I’m keeping my fingers crossed. This is also the first night in a while that the radiators in my building have been on, and their clanking heartens me, because fuck “spring”�I would kill baby bunnies and wring the necks of downy little spring ducklings to have a space heater right now but the stores don’t carry them because it’s “spring,” and so I’ve been forced to go around the house wearing multiple random layers of clothes like an Olsen twin. I shiver at my desk clutching mugs of hot tea. It makes me feel delicate and sleepy.

I am sleepy now, in fact. I should go to bed.

In the meantime, look at the new and improved book site, painstakingly chiselled from rare, imported Bulgarian cybercrystal by Phineas X. Jones. Check out the new dates on the events page!

…because work was hectic all day, and then last night I had no internet because Comcast went down (again):

1. As some of you noticed, the Chicago Sun-Times did a brief story on the book. I’m sorry I didn’t get to mention it before and have therefore deprived you of the full newsprint smudgy-fingers experience. They ran a picture of the INTNM cover and the picture of me from my About page, both of which you’ve probably seen before.

2. I’ll be at Transitions Bookplace tomorow night, reading as a guest of Amy Krouse Rosenthal, along with Claire Zulkey and others. (You won’t be able to buy I’m Not the New Me yet, since it’s not out, but you can come and get some nice hot promo postcards for the book. You still have to come to my Women & Children First reading, you know.)

3. Don’t ever park on Montrose. I live close enough to this street to be convinced that it’s the land of Doomed Street Parking, because in the time I’ve lived here I’ve seen THREE seperate instances of tipsy and/or pharmaceutically drowsy drivers veering off course and smashing into multiple parked cars. Okay, not “seen” but “heard,” and in the case of the most recent incident, “awakened at 5 am to the sound of.” I woke up convinced the world was ending and looked out to see what I guessed was the Swervy Pickup Truck of the Apocalypse pulling over to the curb, with smoke coming from under the chassis, It was just a few car lengths away from a sedan with a big crunchy dent in its side, and in the morning I would notice scrape marks on other cars nearby. The driver got out and threw a bottle into the bushes across the street. It was all very Drivers’ Ed Movie. I heard the police eventually showed up but I’d fallen back asleep by then. DON’T PARK THERE. No no!

4. Did I ever mention I am now in the middle of my third damn boot camp class? I am getting too busy to make it to every class, but at least a couple times a week I go there and call upon the Forces of Fitness to trample me like a herd of Clydesdales. Yes indeedy. Little cartoon puffs of steam are still hovering around my head. That is all.

It’s officially called Pound. Since “pound.com” wasn’t available as a domain, I chose “poundy.com” on a whim. It sounded catchy. And since URLs tend to stick in peoples’ minds, sometimes folks will refer to this site, and even me personally, as “Poundy.” But if you’re a stickler for the facts, the name is Wendy; the site, Pound.

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in case you’re wondering, the finished books are in. There are actual books, which means that when you pre-order the book, you are no longer simply pre-ordering the idea of a book. You’re no longer just humoring me and my nutty book talk. It’s books for reals.

If you’re on my Notify List you know that I had a contest last week, where I invited you guys to look at this page and guess the year in which each photo was taken. The way I set it up, the first three people who correctly guessed the year of four or more photos would win signed copies of the book, and the first three people to guess three photos correctly would win signed galleys. I suspected that some photos would be hard to guess, so I set the bar low.

As it turned out, only ONE person managed to guess four pictures. But several people managed to guess three right within two hours, so I bumped up the two quickest responders to get books, and three more almost-as-speedy people won galleys, and I threw in some postcards and a really dorky mix cd, too. If you won, you’ve already heard from me, and I put your packages in the mail yesterday.

And now, the answers:

Photo #1: 1990. Okay, practically none of you got this right. Maybe like two people. I was actually in college when this picture was taken. Apparently freshman year weight gain + no makeup = freakishly young-looking. Most people seemed to guess around fourteen. I think someone even said I was eight.

Photo #2: 1975. I believe I’m four here. The bear’s name was Thomas and he had a big beanbag belly that caved in rather unnaturally. Do you dig that mod lamp in the background? My family still has it.

Photo #3: 1987. Homecoming dance. And yes, that thing on my head is a clip-on bow. Shut up.

Photo #4: 2000. Man, all you people who thought this was a current picture are in big trouble. My hair is nothing like that now. Well, not like you can see much of it, but still.

Photo #5: 1999. This was somewhere near El Paso, Texas. It only looks like I went through some crazy Fat Mennonite phase.

Photo #6: 1996. I was drunk, kissing my own foot, and had Capri cigarettes in my purse. Let’s not speak of this time again.

Photo #7: 1982. Person in photo is dirtier than she appears. I was playing by the creek at our favorite campground. I was eleven, and this was as long as my hair ever got.

Photo #8: 1971. Clearly I liked my mom’s shoulder enough to give it a thumbs-up rating.

Thanks to everyone who entered!