I thought it would be enough that I have been knitting and knitting and frantically knitting without me having to tell you about how I’ve been doing all this knitting. It’s not the only reason why I haven’t posted in over a week; I do have other stuff I’ve been working on, but let me tell you, there’s been knitting. It’s not very neat knitting and there has been no purling or whatsoever. All I’m doing is making a very skinny scarf, because I want one, and because it allows one to simply knit like a motherfucker.

I don’t think you can call what I’m doing a craft. It’s more compulsive than that. Knitting is Tetris Unplugged. I can’t stop. I take my knitting to bars. I know it’s bad to drink and knit and yet I persist.

Incidentally, the new BUST is out now, and I have a column about 80s music videos. And I just finished the column for the next issue, which is one of the other reasons why I didn’t post. It’s all Debbie Stoller’s fault. Deb, maybe you need to keep your staff writers off this stuff. I’m hooked on yarn smack and I’m shooting it up with big, big needles.

So do you think I can knit a scarf, watch every episode of America’s Next Top Model, AND write a whole book by the summer?! Who does that? CRAZY PEOPLE, THAT’S WHO!